A grown up girl
by Lilly Lone
Summary: Ahsoka's eighteen birthday has her thinking all kind of new things… Anakin and Padmé offer to throw her a dinner party, but the young girl only wishes to discuss all the new feelings and sensations she's experimenting on her way to leave girlhood behind to become a woman.
1. Chapter 1

**Grown up girl**

 **Plot: Ahsoka's eighteen birthday has her thinking all kind of new things… Anakin and Padmé offer to throw her a dinner party, but the young girl wishes to discuss all the new feelings and sensations she's experimenting on her way to leave girlhood behind to become a woman.**

 **Disclaimer *I don't own Star Wars***

1:

In their Coruscant apartment, Anakin and Padmé are finally taking a break from the long day they had experienced.

Having spent all day getting the food and decoration ready, there hadn't really been a moment when they could sit down or even give a little kiss; but they didn't mind-mostly. They were excited for Ahsoka, and they had promised to take care of everything.

"Padmé, sit down here with me for a moment," Anakin said after seeing his wife run back to the kitchen.

"Wait, darling," she cried from the kitchen door. "Let me just check the dessert. It has to be perfect, is Ahsoka's favorite, you know."

"I know, darling. But you have to chill."

"What time is it?"

"Almost six o'clock."

"Oh, I will have to get ready soon."

"I think you're looking pretty good already," Anakin said, flirting.

He walked to her and made her go to sit with him on the living room.

Finally they shared a few embraces. Then, Anakin rested his head on Padmé's lap, while she stroke his golden hair, lovingly.

"Can you believe she's turning eighteen?" Anakin asked, bewilderment showing on his handsome face.

"Crazy, isn't it? It seems like it was yesterday she was a rebellious Padawan."

"She's still that, you know."

They laughed.

"Do you think it'll be long for her to be knighted?"

"I feel like she's more than ready, but the Council…"

He stopped talking, Padmé could tell by his face that he had no desire of speaking about the Jedi Council, for the moment. And he was right, that was supposed to be a festive day, so all subjects about the Republic, the War, politics, Jedi... were absolutely out of place.

"My lady," a golden protocol droid broke in. "I'm sorry to disturb you..."

"Then don't," Anakin interrupted C-3PO, sarcastically.

"Forgive me, but there's a Jedi here who wants to see senator Amidala…"

"What? Who?" Anakin interrupted him again. "Is it Ahsoka? She's not supposed to be here already! The place isn't finished!"

"No, it's not padawan Ahsoka," C-3PO said. "It is master Kenobi."

Anakin gasped.

Oh, shit! He thought.

"Tell him to wait a moment," Padmé said calmly. "Anakin, maybe you should wait in the bedroom…"

"No," Anakin said. "He can sense my presence, anyway. So it's of no use. Besides, I don't think there's anything odd about me being here. After all, we're just preparing a party for my padawan."

"You're right," she accepted. "Let's go together then. Oh, wait!"

"What?"

"You have pink lipstick on your lips," she said blushing.

She came closer to him and helped him clean his mouth.

They walked with C-3PO to welcome Obi-Wan Kenobi.

"Oh, you're here too?" Obi Wan cried, as he saw Anakin walk next to Padmé. He watched them closely.

"Yeah," the young knight said, nervously. "We're fixing everything for Ahsoka's party."

"Well, I regret to tell you, the party's cancelled."

Anakin threw his arms in the air, angrily.

"What is that supposed to mean?" he asked between his teeth. "Is it the will of the Council? Can't a teenager enjoy one night of her life? Can't she take a break from her blasted life as a…"

"Anakin!" Padmé cried, with a look in her eyes that seemed to say, 'shut up before you say too much!'

Anakin swallowed, then he apologized.

"Forgive me, master. I'm sure they have a good reason for this."

The Jedi master sighed. "It's not the Council, Anakin. It's Ahsoka."

"What?" Anakin was confused. "Will you just say what's happening?"

"You must be calm, Anakin. I know you've been planning tonight for a really long time. But it was Ahsoka's decision. She doesn't want a party. She just wants to be alone."

"Where is she?"

"She's staying at the temple. And she doesn't want to be disturbed."

"What about all the guests? Does she realize how much thought we've put into this party? Padmé has been gracious enough to let us use her home and the least Ahsoka can do…"

"Anakin, stop. All the guests have been informed. Of course, I've come to apologize to senator Amidala, and to thank her for all the trouble she went through on Ahsoka's behalf—"

"It is Ahsoka who should be here apologizing to Padmé!" Anakin cried.

"Oh, please," Padmé said, softly. "Do not worry about me, I did all for her. If she wants to be alone tonight, then that's her decision Anakin. We must respect her."

"Exactly," Obi-Wan said.

"Well, of course I respect her decision!" Anakin said. "But I have to find out what's wrong!"

"Why do you assume there's something wrong?" Obi-Wan questioned.

"Because I—I know her. I will find out what's going on."

He scratched his head in desperation, and then he turned his back on everyone.

"Where are you going?" Padmé asked.

"To find her. I have to talk to her."

"Anakin!" Obi-Wan and Padmé cried at the same time.

It was of no use. He had gone.

"Don't worry," Obi-Wan said. "I'll go get him. He must respect Ahsoka's wishes." He sighed. "Forgive me again, senator. For both Ahsoka and Anakin."

"They are very similar," she said smiling. "I hope she's alright."

"Don't worry about her. Goodbye, my dear."

"Good bye, Obi-Wan."

The Jedi took a bow and smiled once more. Then he went after Anakin.

* * *

Padmé had almost finished cleaning her apartment up.

She sat alone in the dark of her dining room, barely enjoying Ahsoka's favorite dessert.

She felt a little sad, after expecting great company that night, she had to now go to sleep early, and alone.

If only at least Anakin had stayed to keep her company. But like usual, her husband allowed his own feelings get the best of him. Whatever. Who cares if he can be a little selfish or unreasonable? Not Padmé. She loved him too much, and she was longing to be in his arms, hearing his voice, being loved…

Whoa.

What was that?

"Threepio?" she cried upon hearing noises coming from her balcony.

She stood up, and started sweating. That couldn't be Anakin. Someone had broken into her home.

She reached for the pocket of her dress and took her blaster, ready for whoever had dared come into the personal space of a former queen of Naboo.

She walked slowly, watching her step and her every corner.

When she finally reached her balcony, it was deserted.

"Hmm," she mumbled. "I guess it's just my imagination."

She turned around to enter her living room and a sudden face appeared, hardly a few inches away from her own face.

"Ahhh!" she screamed, in fear and surprise. "Oh! Force, Ahsoka! Why do you sneak in like that?"

"I'm sorry!" Ahsoka cried. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"Then why did you come in like that? Why didn't you use the door?"

"I wanted to make sure you were alone… You are alone, right?"

Padmé still looked red from the shock she had experienced. She straight up turned into a tomato after hearing Ahsoka's question.

"Of course I'm alone!" Padmé cried. "Who could be here with me?"

Ahsoka lowered her gaze. "No one of course… I just… I want to talk to you."

"Of course, Ahsoka," Padmé now softened her tone. And she smiled and put a hand on Ahsoka's shoulder. "Anything you want, honey."

"Okay," the birthday girl sighed.

They walked to the dining room and Padmé served Ahsoka the dinner she had prepared for her, and of course, her favorite dessert. As she set the table, Padmé noticed for the first time, Ahsoka's strange eyes. They looked different. There was a quality to them that Padmé had never seen in them before. Could it be… maturity? Perhaps, but it seemed like so much more. Of course, Padmé wouldn't say anything about it to Ahsoka. She would only listen. Yet Ahsoka didn't seem to be so much in a mood for speaking.


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay, so I don't know if this subject had been discussed. But I always wondered how teenagers managed such a hard time in a person's life as adolescence is, while being in an order as strict as the Jedi order. Ahsoka is an especial case since she has friends outside the order and a very… let's say, liberal? Open minded master? Well, the point is, she has Anakin. And she had to grow up as a warrior. And I seriously doubt one could go through life without having these thoughts and feelings.**

 **I apologize in advance, lol.**

 **The rating will now change. Mature content will appear in future chapters.**

 **I don't know about you, but in my country, that means you HAVE TO BE at least eighteen.**

 **Please review and let me know what you think.**

2:

Ahsoka had finished eating, the meal and the dessert. Padmé occasionally looked at her, but their eyes never met. It was a very silent meal, too.

Will she ever say what she wanted? Padmé wondered. She decided to help her.

"So, Ahsoka," Padmé said, casually. "How was your day?"

"Fine," she answered, quietly.

"Just fine? This must've been a special day. It's only once you turn eighteen Ahsoka!"

The teenager looked annoyed beyond Padmé's reason. Hadn't she come to speak? Maybe Anakin was right and something did happen to her.

"If there's anything you need help with, anything you want to say," Padmé's voice was very calm and soothing. "I'm here for you."

"You couldn't help me…" Ahsoka muttered.

"Let's try."

Ahsoka stood up and she started to walk around, nervously.

She took deep breath after deep breath.

Padmé was starting to get worried.

"Senator…" Ahsoka said.

"How many times do I have to tell you? Just call me Padmé."

"Padmé, I wanted to talk to you—about—well, about…"

"Yes?"

"There's just no one else I could talk to about this!"

About what? Oh, Ahsoka.

The dining room was still a gloomy dark. Only a few candles lighted the two girls.

"Can I ask you something?" Ahsoka blurred out, suddenly.

Padmé nodded.

"When did you…? When did you start to feel like a woman?"

Padmé was taken aback. That was not the question she was expecting, of course she answered it without problem.

"Well," she said. "It's hard to say. I mean, I became queen of Naboo when I was fourteen. Though I don't know if I can say I felt like a woman since then... It must've been somewhere around the time my home planet was invaded while under my care." She looked at Ahsoka, trying to see whether she was boring the girl with her story or not, Ahsoka seemed to be genuinely interested. So Padmé went on, "I think you can't be an adult until you start worrying about others. That's how you know childhood is over; when all fun and games are over, when you have responsibilities and people who depend on you. It's hard, of course. Sometimes you wish you could have a little time for yourself, but the fact that you chose others before you, that means you're a woman."

Ahsoka considered Padmé's answer for a moment.

"Hmm," she mumbled again and again.

"Do you ever feel like a girl again?" Ahsoka asked.

"No," Padmé looked a bit sad. "I can't remember a time when I felt innocent. Purely innocent."

"Me too," Ahsoka said.

"Is that what's bothering you? Honey, I know growing up can be scary, but there's nothing wrong about getting older…"

"It's not about getting older."

"Then?"

"Well, I just—I keep having these feelings. Strange feelings and sensations that I never had before. And I don't really know what to do about it. Usually I meditate in the temple, or I speak to one of the older Jedi… but in this case, well none of those will help."

"How do you know? Have you talked to them?"

"No! I couldn't. They're… forbidden feelings. But, what am I talking about? All feelings are forbidden!"

"No Ahsoka. That's not true. Technically, attachment is. Possession is forbidden. Compassion, which you could define as unconditional love, is essential to a Jedi's life. So you might say, you are encouraged to love..."

"That's one way to look at it—but it's not how any Jedi would think. Maybe master Anakin-"

Padmé had to look away, less Ahsoka could see her blush.

"Ahsoka, are you in love?" Padmé asked, smiling.

She looked down.

"I could never fall in love!" Ahsoka cried. "It's against the Jedi code!"

"It's normal. If you are…"

"No! You don't get it! I mean, how could I ever fall in love? If as a Jedi I'm not allowed to even…" Ahsoka cut herself short.

Padmé got closer to her, Ahsoka had turned her back on her, but she felt as the young senator put her soft hands on her cheeks, lifting her head, forcing her to look at her in the eyes.

"Speak your mind Ahsoka. Don't hold anything back. You can trust me. I'll never tell anyone anything that you don't want to—"

She couldn't say anything else.

Ahsoka had jumped and kissed Padmé on the lips.

It was a somewhat awkward and hard pick on the lips.

Immediately, Ahsoka stopped and ran from the room.


	3. Chapter 3

3:

Ahsoka was by the door already, but Padmé managed to stop her. She grabbed her arms and forced her to go into the living room.

"Leave me alone!" Ahsoka cried.

"Honey, we need to talk about this," Padmé said.

"No, we don't! Please, senator Amidala. Don't tell anyone!"

"Ahsoka, it hurts me that you can think I would ever betray your trust like that. My dear, you're obviously very confused and I'm here for you. Come on, we will talk this through. You're not leaving this place until you feel better. Come, Ahsoka. Please."

Ahsoka looked up and faced her.

Padmé never lost that comforting smile.

Ahsoka nodded and decided to follow her.

"And please, for the million time, call me Padmé."

* * *

"Don't turn on the lights," Ahsoka pleaded.

"All right, honey. Whatever you want."

They were in Padmé's spacious living room, sitting in the couch in which Padmé had been kissing her husband, earlier.

There was a great distance between the two women, Padmé could tell Ahsoka was very much embarrassed.

"I'm not in love with you!" Ahsoka cried.

Padmé laughed. "I didn't think you were," she said.

"I don't know why I kissed you."

"I am not asking for a reason."

"Well, I am. Why do you think I did it?"

"Ahsoka, as we get older, it's very normal to have these… urges. Desire. Lust. There's nothing to be ashamed about it."

"Then why am I so ashamed?"

"Because you're inexperienced, honey. Everyone goes through this, you know."

"Really? So it's not just me?"

"Of course not! Tell me, do you often feel like kissing—women?"

"Oh, that's the worst of it! It's… both men and women!"

Ahsoka buried her face in her hands.

"Okay," Padmé accepted. "That's okay. Is it anyone in particular? Is it—everyone you see?"

"No! Of course not."

"Okay, okay. Sorry! Go on."

Ahsoka took a deep breath.

"Sometimes, well it's usually with young men. To be honest, you're the only women I've ever… you know. It took me by surprise as much as you."

"Alright. Any guy in particular?"

"Yes. There's been a few guys I've met throughout the years. Some guy's I've liked. But lately, well it's been sort of intense. When it's more than just liking a guy. More than being attracted to someone. It's a desire of being with him more, and of being liked by him, and of… I don't know. I've often wondered what it would be like to kiss him. But because nothing can happen between us, I—I sometimes just… flirt with other guys. And I like when I get their attention. When I can tell that they like me, but I never have the courage to do anything. And I end up feeling frustrated."

Ahsoka laid herself on the couch and covered her eyes with her hands.

"What's wrong with me!" she cried.

"Nothing, honey." Padmé said. "You're just getting older. It's perfectly normal."

"Is it?"

"Yes."

"Did you ever feel like that? Like, desperate to touch a man?"

Padmé laughed quietly, and she put a hand on her chest, feeling her own heartbeat. Going through a lot of memories.

"Yes. And it is a feeling as wonderful as it is painful."

"How do you get rid of it?"

Again, Padmé laughed.

"You have to experience, honey. There's no other way, I think. Try go after that guy! Follow your heart!"

Ahsoka rolled her eyes.

"I tell you, I'm not in love. I just know it."

"Okay, Ahsoka. But you do like him? Maybe he likes you, too."

"You know, there is an age difference between us."

"Really? How big?"

"Like five years..."

Padmé felt offended somewhat.

"Hey, that's barely an age difference!"

"You think he would think that?"

"You don't lose anything by asking."

"It's Anakin," Ahsoka cried, and she felt a million pounds lighter afterwards.

Padmé's mouth dropped against her will.

As much as she wanted to be supportive and help Ahsoka, she couldn't help the first feeling that came to her, that of jealousy. Then, when she took it all in, she understood Ahsoka. Padmé herself often had crushes for her teachers when she was younger. It's a fantasy hard to resist. And well, Anakin is so young and beautiful. Could she even blame Ahsoka? No. She understood it was just a teenage girl crush. It would come to pass. Of course, she had already regretted her initial advice. Anakin should never know of Ahsoka's feelings.

"Well," at last Padmé found her voice. "That kind of changes things…"

"Yes."

"But, you know Ahsoka. Anakin isn't the only guy in the world. And you can release all your impulses on someone else…"

"Like who? Who would keep a secret affair with a Jedi?"

I know I would, Padmé thought.

"I just can't help it," Ahsoka said. "When I see him in action, oh he's so brave! So powerful! So unafraid! And he cares for me, he always takes such good care of me. Not like I wish, but he does. And from some time I noticed… I noticed his beautiful smile. His broad shoulders, so muscular, so damn strong… oh he makes me so hot!"

Padmé also laid herself on the couch.

She closed her eyes and imagined Anakin was there with her. She thought of all the things Ahsoka had said, and she thought she was damn right.

If only you knew! She thought. He's more than beauty. He's a caring and passionate lover. If only you knew Ahsoka… what it's like to be kissed by his soft lips, to be touched by his strong, big hands...

Oh Anakin!

How could a woman not fall in love with him?

Padmé couldn't blame Ahsoka at all.

If as a teenager Padmé developed crushes for some simple guys, politicians and royals, how could she ask for an eighteen year old to not be captivated and seduced by a Jedi Knight? By Anakin Skywalker!

"I understand you," Padmé said.

"I know you do," Ahsoka responded.

For a second, Padmé felt worried.

"Of course, because I was once a teenager…"Padmé quickly pointed out.

"Should I say anything to him?" Ahsoka asked.

"No!" Padmé cried.

"So? What do you recommend?"

Padmé got up, she took Ahsoka's hands in her own, and she stroke her cheek, saying:

"We girls, Ahsoka… well. Sometime we—we help each other out."

"How?"

"Like I did before. To avoid getting hurt by boys, or be embarrassed by showing our lack of experience and maturity…"

Ahsoka was still laying down on the couch, and she saw, Padmé's face approaching.

Padmé's lips were on Ahsoka's one cheek, then on the other, alternately on and on, moisten her skin. Ahsoka felt a warm feeling run slowly through her. Then fast.

"Do you want me to kiss you?" Padmé whispered at her ear.

"Y-yes!" Ahsoka exclaimed. "Yes, Padmé. Kiss me!"

She did so.

It wasn't a kiss like the one they had before.

Padmé was well experienced.

She softly laid her lips on Ahsoka's, then she said, "Open your mouth honey,"

Ahsoka did it.

"Use your tongue," Padmé instructed her. "Lick my tongue with yours, Ahsoka."

She did so.

Ahsoka had never felt so good before. Yet never worse.

She just felt the urge for more, accumulating within her, while not getting full satisfaction. Yet she feared to ask for more.

"Hmm," Ahsoka moaned happily and quietly.

"How do you feel?" Padmé asked in a vibrant whisper.

"Strange… stranger than ever… but so good!"

"Is it enough?"

"I—I don't know…"

Padmé had only intended for a little kissing, she never would've expected Ahsoka's hands rubbing her back and then touching her thighs. But she let her.

Let her release all her basic instincts, she thought, she's waited long enough.

Ahsoka was quickly getting better at kissing, Padmé felt, and definitely more desperate in her embraces; Padmé had only intended to liberate the young girl, to help her discover new feelings and emotions and experience… but the senator found a lot of new things about herself, too.

Padmé had only kissed a girl once before, and it was during a game at a sleep over, one of the few instances in her life when she could behave like a normal teenager, and not a responsible politician. She barely felt anything then; she only discovered true desire after falling for the Jedi Anakin Skywalker. Of course, she had a few boyfriends before him, though no one had made her feel like Anakin managed. But now… the wild kisses that that teen girl gave and demanded from her, set Padmé's loins on fire.

She was definitely past just helping a friend out, she was enjoying her like she enjoyed her husband.

She moved on top of her and saw the mixture of confusion, fear, lust and longing on Ahsoka's young face.

Padmé's luscious lips then moved towards Ahsoka's neck, and there they stayed for little. After removing her own shirt, she removed Ahsoka's and licked her lovely breasts. Ahsoka couldn't help the cries of joy that came to her lips.

"Go on!" Ahsoka cried.

"You kiss me…now" Padmé half asked half ordered.

Ahsoka froze for a second. She looked at Padmé, at her entire figure, and she placed herself now on top of her. Padmé had on a pretty purple bra, Ahsoka had never seen one on another girl, she just tried to remove it but her hands didn't know how. Padmé helped her and removed it herself. Ahsoka put both hands on her, slowly and almost lovingly—then, she put her lips on Padmé's body. She made a good run from her belly button, to her breasts, neck, cheeks, finally landing on Padmé's pink lips. Then she stopped.

Padmé opened the eyes that till then had been closed in pure pleasure, and she set them on Ahsoka, with a look that seemed to say, "What's wrong? Why do you stop?"

Padmé turned her face slightly and she saw, standing by the door of the living room, her bewildered husband.

* * *

 **A/N: To quote George Lucas, "I might have gone too far in a few places."**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I want to let you know that I listened to your suggestions and it's almost like you guys read my mind, lol. I just want to ask for a little patience here, we will get to that place, but for now, patience, I say!**

 **Also, I listened to the Rolling Stone's song Start Me Up to gain a little bit of inspiration for this chapter.**

 **Thanks for reading, I hope you can enjoy this.**

4:

Ahsoka distanced herself immediately from Padmé's body, she gasped and turned her face towards any direction that allowed her to not be looked at in the eyes.

She quickly picked up her blouse and hastened to cover herself, she noticed Padmé didn't covered herself in modesty, the senator couldn't stop looking at the Jedi's confused eyes, so Padmé's breast were in full view of everyone.

Everything happened in a few seconds that felt like an eternity for those present.

Anakin passed his hands through his face and muttered, awkwardly, "What—is—going-on?"

"Uh—what do you think?" Ahsoka said, sharply.

Padmé at last seemed to react, and now she picked up her blouse to conceal her breasts.

The three of them looked only at the floor and the uncomfortable silence prevailed for some time. Padmé was the most mature one, so she felt responsible to break the ice.

"Anakin, could you leave me alone with Ahsoka for a minute?" she asked in a tone that made Anakin understand.

"Of course," he said, as calmly as he could and still looking down.

"Wait," Ahsoka said. "What are you doing here?" she questioned looking suspiciously at Anakin.

Anakin and Padmé were silent. Ahsoka could almost understand.

"I was looking for you, Snips," Anakin blurred out. "I'll be back in a minute."

"No," Ahsoka said.

"Why?" Anakin finally looked at her.

Ahsoka took a deep breath, she looked at Padmé and then at Anakin.

"I want to talk to you first."

Padmé's eyes were opened wide.

"In private." Ahsoka looked more confident than Padmé had seen her that night.

"Why don't we go into the bedroom?" Anakin said innocently. "If senator Amidala allows us, of course."

Both girls turned red.

"Of course. But, I mean… Wouldn't you prefer to talk here?" Padmé cried, nervously.

"Ahsoka wants to talk in private. I think you can grant us this favor," Anakin said. And in his eyes it seemed to say, _"It's the least you can do…"_

Padmé had to let her husband go into their own bedroom with that young girl, whom she knew, had feelings for him, and who was discovering womanhood at a fast pace.

The senator sighed.

Padmé hoped she had pleased Ahsoka enough so that the teen girl could control herself with Anakin, but the senator knew, she had only started Ahsoka up.

* * *

"Well, Snips?" Anakin said sitting on the bed and motioning Ahsoka to do the same. But she just stood in front of him.

"Anakin…" Ahsoka said. He felt weird being addressed thus. He was used to Ahsoka calling him _Master._

"I know what you're about to say, Snips. You can trust me. I won't tell the Council about what happened here. I promise."

"That's not what I wanted to talk about, Anakin. But, thanks," she smiled at him and got closer.

"Oh," he was surprised. "What then? If it's about… what I saw… I don't think we should talk about that…"

"Okay. We can ignore that subject for now. So, you came here looking for me?"

Anakin blinked many times, like any time he got ready to tell a lie.

"Yes," he said as confidently as he could. "That's why I came here."

"How did you know I was here?"

"Um," he coughed awkwardly, giving time to think of an excuse. "The force-"

"Mmmh. All right," she pretended that she believed him. "And why were you looking for me?"

"Well, Snips. I was worried about you. Why did you cancel your birthday party? I thought you were looking forward to it…"

"Could you not call me _Snips_ anymore?" she cried and Anakin was hurt.

He liked that nickname and he thought Ahsoka did, too.

She just needed for him to not see her as a child anymore.

She wanted to be a woman in Anakin's eyes.

"All right," he said, bitterly. "Tell me, _Ahsoka_. Why did you cancel the party?"

"I couldn't face everyone tonight," she confessed. "I really couldn't stand a crowd, tonight more than ever. I needed to talk to someone, and I thought Padmé could help me."

"Why her? Why didn't you come to me?"

"I was scared to see you," she lowered her voice.

"What?! Why?"

She was silent.

Anakin stood up and reached her.

He put his hands on her shoulders, and he made her look up to face him.

"Whatever it is, Sni—Ahsoka. You can tell me."

"Anakin, you are my master, so you are the one I should look for, for counsel. For support."

"That's what I said."

"You've never been afraid of breaking the rules. The Jedi code, I mean."

"Yeah, that might be true."

"Do you think the code is wrong? Some of the rules are, not only strict, but ridiculous?"

He had to be honest with her. "Yes…" he said, weakly. And closing his eyes, he thought of his loving, and now unfaithful, wife.

"Do you think a Jedi should be allowed to form attachments? Shouldn't we at least have the right to… to try and find love?"

He had thought of that over a thousand times. It was his duty to protect the Jedi code, and to instruct his Padawan to follow the rules. But regarding that subject, he had no moral authority to make her obey.

He nodded and looked at her with supreme guilt.

But where was she even going with all that?

"Anakin," she said, removing his hands from her shoulders, but keeping them in her own fist. "I want to break the rules! I mean, I already did, a little bit. But I want to do it again! The rule about attachment is stupid, you think so too, I am sure." Slowly she made Anakin put his strong hands on her, and the man, dumfounded, allowed her. "I want us to break them together! I am not a child anymore. I am a woman, so you must look at me like that… like I know you look at her…" she had pushed him. Pushed him to the bed and she had roughly placed herself on top of him. Wildly covering him in kisses and touching him everywhere. It didn't matter that he was almost immobile. She was enjoying him even more than she had enjoyed the senator.

Anakin's basic instincts of a man were too strong. He felt the embraces of that young creature and couldn't stop the arousal that accumulated within him.

Ahsoka had learned a lot in her recent make out session with senator Amidala. And the kiss she was finally able to plant on Anakin's delicious lips, was that of a more experienced mouth.

Ahsoka was moaning joyously and wetting Anakin's ear when he finally realized what was happening.

He was in bed with his Padawan!

Had there ever been a worse Jedi? He wondered as he opened his eyes and saw Ahsoka's face, trembling with pleasure.

Had there ever been a worse husband? He thought, as he played with a teen girl on his wife's bed.

Padmé!

What would she say if she knew…!

But he had already walked in on her on a similar position…

Damn, what was happening to Ahsoka? Why was she suddenly so irresistible?

That was a question for later, right now, he had to stop that mad scene.

Ahsoka's fingers were now playing with the Jedi's robes, she was getting ready to undress him, when Anakin cried, "Stop!"

She jumped, afraid at his sudden harsh voice.

He looked almost menacing, and tough, which made Ahsoka's desire for him even greater.

"Why, Anakin? I thought you were enjoying…"

"Ahsoka. We can't do this!" he cried, desperate and still trembling from her embraces.

"Yes we can!"

"Padmé is outside, she could hear us… or worse, see us!"

Ahsoka got far from him.

She had thought he was worrying about the Jedi code.

But, at last!

Her suspicions were confirmed.

Sudden jealousy possessed her.

"And? What if she sees us?" she cried, angrily. "Do you think she's in love with me? Do you think we would hurt her? Or do you think she would tell the Council about us? Uh, Anakin? Why can't she see us?"

Anakin stood up and started walking around the room.

He was truly lost and didn't know what to do. So he asked her.

"We could keep it a secret," Ahsoka suggested. "The Council doesn't have to know."

"Ahsoka," he looked at her and finally, she felt that he thought of her as a woman. "I—can't lie to you… there can't be anything between us… because I… well, I—"

"You don't love me?" she said, laughing bitterly. "Don't worry, master. I am not in love with you either! But I like you, Anakin. Our relationship can exist, as long as we don't form any true attachments…"

"Ahsoka. You're wrong. I do love you! It's just, it's a different kind of love. I always thought of you like a sister. And I never expected for you… well, it's kind of dumb. But I never expected for you to grow up so much!"

"Do you have any feelings for me that aren't those of a brother?"

"Before tonight I didn't."

"Have I changed that?"

He was shaking. Ahsoka, for some reason, enjoyed to see him suffer a little for her.

A knock on the door saved Anakin from saying too much.

"Is everything all right?" Padmé asked from the other side of the door.

"Y-yes!" Anakin cried, nervously.

"Can I come in?"

"Sure! Come in…"

Padmé walked in and saw them.

They were standing pretty far from the other.

Ahsoka didn't look very happy.

Anakin's hair was all messy and his robes, too.

Padmé's voice almost failed her when she tried to speak again.

"I hope everything is okay," she said with a fake smile.

"Yea…" Anakin tried his best to look calm.

"Are you all right, Ahsoka?" Padmé asked.

The birthday girl got closer to the Jedi and Senator, and she looked at both with a strange smile.

"Better than ever," she said. "Thanks for tonight! It wasn't what I was expecting but it was a million times better!"

Anakin and Padmé felt strange and somehow played.

Neither one of them could fake a smile anymore, nor conceal the awkwardness they were feeling.

Ahsoka looked liberated and youthful.

"We should probably get back to the temple," she said taking Anakin's hand. He almost slap it away; he was feeling more guilt than ever in his short life, and that said a lot for someone with so many dark deeds behind his belt.

Padmé regarded her husband with a look that said, _don't you dare go with her!_

But they still had a secret marriage to keep. So he agreed to go with her.

Padmé ushered the Jedi knight and Padawan to the door.

"Thanks for everything, senator! It was a really fun birthday!" Ahsoka said shamelessly, as she kissed Padmé's cheek and then went back to taking Anakin's arm.

* * *

 **A/N: I know i said I would be continuing, but I feel like this could be a good ending for the story.**

 **I don't know... please leave suggestions!**

 **Thanks for reading my crazy ideas and for not judging me!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Yep, this isn't over.**

 **Thanks to anyone who's still interested in this story, and for those who're just getting here: WELCOME!**

 **A/N: I feel the need to explain myself for the last chapter.**

 **If Anakin's reaction seemed too mellow or calm for his character, it's mainly because he was acting for the sake of his secret marriage, and it would've looked too suspicious and weird for him to act all jealous when he and Padmé are supposed to be just friends. And he was in too much of a state of shock…**

 **About Rush Clovis… well, what was Anakin to do? Beat Ahsoka or Padmé to death? He has anger issues and a dark personality but at this point in the Clone Wars they're not so bad. You will find out later why exactly he wasn't angry.**

 **Also, I want to say it at once so you won't be too disappointed later: I do not believe in polygamy. I don't judge it, I have nothing against it—I just don't think a person can love more than one at the same time. Love is only a sentiment between two people. In my mind, at least.**

 **That is not to say that the characters don't have feelings of love for each other here; they do, but only Anakin and Padmé are IN love. In a corresponded way.**

 **So while I'd be interested in reading about a relationship with more than two people, I do not feel qualified enough to write it.**

 **It was my intention from the beginning to write a relationship between the three of them, but** _ **only**_ **a physical one; if you can settle for that, you might still enjoy the next chapters, if you want a true love story between Anakin, Padmé and Ahsoka, you will probably dislike what I write.**

 **About Ahsoka acting unhealthy: You're right. That was my intention.**

 **Although the story has humor and it can be quite sexy (I hope) it has a meaning.**

 **The Jedi order was incredibly flawed. Making its members repress all their feelings and emotions; I don't know if it's true, but I hear they don't forbid sex, as long as you don't get attached to the person you have sex with. What?! That's crazy and it can really mess with the mind of a teenager. That's why Ahsoka acts the way she does, driven almost entirely by desire.**

 **If it looked like I was slut-shaming her, I apologize, that was not my intention.**

 **Well, we're past Ahsoka's birthday and on to the consequences of what happened.**

 **Man, that is one long Author's Note.** _ **Sorry**_ **. Here is the actual story, hope you can enjoy!**

 **Lana Del Rey lyric to go on:**

" **Let's take Jesus off the dashboard—got enough on his mind."**

* * *

5:

She was wrapped around the white sheets of their bed, rolling around, unable of falling asleep. Thinking over and over again about how things got so messed up so quickly.

 _Why did I kiss her_! Padmé was angry at herself. Why did she even listen to her? Ahsoka had surely acted ungrateful afterwards.

 _She knows…!_ Padmé was sure. Ahsoka must know about Padmé and Anakin. So why did she act the way she did? Out of love? No, she had said it wasn't love. Spite? Lust? Whatever it was, Padmé couldn't contain the rage she was feeling against Anakin and Ahsoka. She didn't see them together, but she was sure something had happened between them. Anakin's face said it all, Ahsoka's shameless attitude proved it, too.

But did Padmé have the right to be angry? How could she demand loyalty from her husband when she…

That is another thing that keeps her up at night.

If it would've been a small kiss, something playful… or just had continued to talk about it… oh why did Padmé let herself be carried away by desire as if she were also a hormonal teenager?

Though she tries to hate Ahsoka—giving her attitude towards her husband—Padmé can't avoid the red that roses to her face as she thinks of the kisses she and Ahsoka shared. Such an awkward beginning, such a fast learning girl…

The thought of Ahsoka on top of her almost makes her insides be set on fire—in a matter of speaking…

She thinks of her soft lips, so much softer than any others she had kissed before, and her hands that ran through her hungrily, the way she moaned for her; And the knowledge of knowing she was Ahsoka's first kiss, probably. She had made her happy for a bit, she had set her free, and she thought, bitterly, she had created a monster!

Padmé had to feel responsible, after all, she was the grown up. Shouldn't she feel like she had taken advantage of a young, emotional and confused girl?

Because, truthfully, she felt like _she_ was the one who got played.

A week has passed already, and no word from either one of them.

She knows they're still at the temple—she had been investigating. So why hadn't Anakin return to her when they had so many things to clear out?

The thought of Anakin and Ahsoka together hurt her heart; she just couldn't accept any other woman being with Anakin, she still loved him too much.

* * *

Anakin had been training all day, like all week.

He had really tried to make himself appear busy, the last thing he wanted or could do, was talk to people.

He really hoped the other Jedi couldn't sense how much he hated to be at the temple for the moment.

Because as he walked through every hall, every wall, every room, he couldn't help the feeling of immense guilt he was carrying.

When someone said something like, "Master Anakin-Master Skywalker…" it made him feel so undeserving of the words, he almost confessed all that he had done.

And he wanted to see her, to demand an explanation from her, while at the same time, he dreaded and feared for the truth. It had been a week since he saw Padmé, but it's not really his fault—not entirely—that he hadn't gone to her.

Ahsoka had been on him the whole time. Watching him, questioning him, making it impossible for Anakin to sneak out of the temple at night to go see his wife.

They hadn't spoke about what happened again—not because Ahsoka didn't try, cause she did—Anakin refused to even acknowledge it, which enraged Ahsoka extremely.

He feared someone, especially Obi-Wan, could sense what was happening, so he patiently waited for their next mission so they could be out in the battlefield, unable of worrying about anything other than making it out alive.

As he was working out, Anakin sensed someone was coming to him.

"Do you ever get tired?" his old master said to him.

"I just want to be in shape for our next mission," Anakin said to Obi-Wan. "You never know, maybe soon I'll finally have the pleasure of meeting Grievous."

"The fact that you can call it a 'pleasure' proves you have never seen him."

"Sorry master, I forgot you were friends."

"Very funny. Seriously Anakin, you should probably go to bed now."

"Nah... I am not tired. Do you know when we're leaving?"

"Well, it appears we'll be needed in Ringo Vinda soon. I say, another week. Which you should really spend resting after such an incredible last week."

"It hasn't been incredible… I think Ahsoka should stay here."

"Really? And why is that?"

"Well, I am just worried the war is gonna burn her out."

"You don't trust her anymore to take care of herself?"

"It's not that… I think she should also focus on her studies here at the temple. If I recall, I never spend so much time away when I was a padawan."

"There wasn't a war then. But I think there's sense to your suggestion."

"Really?"

"Absolutely. Ahsoka has grown up in the middle of a war. Maybe it would be good for her to distance herself from the situation."

"I agree."

"Still, I'd hate to be the one to tell her. Would you be my guest?"

"What?!"

"Would you tell her?"

"What—why me?"

"She's your padawan. I'm sure she'll listen to you—as much as you've always listened to me…"

"Come on, master! I—I don't want to."

"Why not?"

Anakin feared Obi-Wan could suspect, but as much as he tried, he couldn't make himself look calm.

"Please, Obi-Wan. I'm trying to work out here. Just tell her. I don't want to."

"All right…" obi-Wan was confused. He thought he and Anakin were just joking, it was strange to see his former padawan so suddenly somber. So suddenly down.

* * *

Anakin decided to spend the night working out.

He was all covered in sweat and he kept releasing all his inner struggles and anger into a punching box. Sunrise was still an hour or two away, when he sensed, again, someone coming his way. This wasn't Obi-Wan. _Oh, damn!_ He thought.

"Go back the same way you came in," Anakin said, harshly before she even make a sound.

"You don't get to tell me what to do," Ahsoka said, rebelliously.

"As a matter of fact, I do. I am still your master, remember?"

"You were the one who forgot it a few nights ago…"

"Shut it, Ahsoka! Are you crazy? We can't talk about that here!"

"Where should we talk about it?"

"Nowhere! We should forget about it already!"

"No we don't. We can´t."

"I can."

"You're lying. I bet that's all you've been thinking about."

"I said, drop it! It was a mistake."

"Yet you don't regret it."

"What!"

"Do you?"

"I tell you, just forget about it!"

"I also have no regrets."

"You should."

"So do you. Yet you wish…"

"You don't know what I wish!"

"But I do! You've been trying to sneak out of the temple, like you usually do. To spend the night somewhere else…"

"Will you stop talking!" he had run to her, and with his hands, he managed to keep her from opening her mouth. He felt how he had frightened her and immediately drop his hands, feeling guilt coming back with more strength than ever.

"I am a horrible person," he said, lowly.

She was silent.

"I'm sorry, Ahsoka. I never meant to play with your emotions. If you can't forget about what we did, then don't. But don't expect for it to happen again. It won't."

He held his head up and saw her, there were tears streaming down her face.

"You won't even want me as a friend anymore…" she said between her weeping.

"What?"

"You don't even want me to go with you on the next mission! Master Kenobi told me. Anakin, this isn't all my fault. May I remind you, you kissed me, too!"

He passed his hands through his face, and with a gesture of despair, said, "I know. I have no excuse. I don't deserve to ask for forgiveness."

"You mean forgiveness to me, the Jedi, or…"

"I beg you, stop."

"Fine. If that's what you want—I will ask for another mentor."

"What?!"

"I will not stay behind while the war advances just because you can't man up to what you did. The Galaxy needs as many Jedi possible. People aren't to blame for our actions."

"Ahsoka, you're talking crazy! You can't leave me! You almost did it once, and you don't know how much that scared me and hurt me!"

"That was different. I had lost my faith in the Jedi Order, but I still had some left in you. But now? You've let me down, Anakin. I don't trust the Jedi Order any more than I did when they didn't trust me. I don't trust you, since you've proven I am not important to you. They have finally done it! Master Windu would be so proud! I will never become attached to anything or anyone again! I will ask for a new master and fight the war like all the Clones and Masters… doing it for the sake of peace. Not for the people. Not for anyone! Goodbye!"

She had made move to leave him, but he used the Force to stop her.

He saw her chest and noticed how madly she was breathing. In the Force, he could feel her emotion stronger than ever.

He should've let her go.

* * *

 **Another A/N: I don't know what happens in the Jedi temple or if they have a gym or how they train, maybe I was way off here, if I was, I apologize.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: For the sake of the plot here, the Jedi will be terrible at sensing things happening right in the middle of their noses. Let's be honest, though, that's kinda how it was in the movies...**

6:

Daytime had come in Coruscant, inside Anakin's private quarters, he welcomed the sun with Ahsoka lying next to him. His bed was quite small, so they had to hold each other very closely to fit more nicely.

She was sleeping soundly. Her cute face smiling in the midst of her slumber. Finally, the young girl had had what she for so long had been waiting for. A night with Anakin.

He had touched her everywhere, being careful of not making her scream too loudly, less they could be discovered. His touch was not very tender—it was wild, desperate, and crazy, and she wouldn't have wanted it any other way. His mouth had sought hers hungrily, his tongue had reached her more private places. He had ridden her as if she were an object of his desire, some sort of fantasy of his male imagination. And she was unaware of it.

She had nothing to compare it with.

It was the first time she ever had sex, and she was innocent enough to think she had awoken something in Skywalker other than pleasure. In her teen heart, she thought she was making her way into Anakin's kind heart.

She was dreaming of him, dreaming that they left the Order to be happy together. In her dream, Anakin looked at her with eyes of love, pure and life-long. And he told her, "I love you, Ahsoka! I love you more than anything!"

And as she rolled around Anakin's bed, she said, out loud and drunk in love. "I love you, too! Forever! I will always love you!"

And if Anakin would've heard her, it would've broken his heart and shattered his soul. Taking him to levels of guilt he didn't know were possible.

But he wasn't there with her anymore.

He had taken the opportunity of being without supervision to finally go and meet his wife.

He wasn't sure of what he was going to say or hear, nor of how much of the truth could be said without destroying his life—but in truth, he hardly cared. He was desperate to see her. After all, there had been more than seven days since they were last together. And he missed her and was soon going out into the battlefield again.

* * *

He broke into her apartment like so many times before. At that early hour almost everyone was still asleep. He begged the Force that Padmé was also still in bed. He needed to clear his mind before really speaking to her.

And as it turns out, she was still sleeping.

In their wide bed, wrapped in those perfectly clean, white sheets. Her long brown curls scattered around her many soft pillows; her smooth skin shining thanks to the strong rays of sunshine coming from the window. Her breathing, normal and calm showing on her chest.

And the way Anakin beheld the image of the sleeping woman, was a million years away from the way he did earlier with Ahsoka.

Padmé was his life.

He would kill and die a million lives for her.

He could stay there watching her forever and be happy, just by having her close, just by knowing she's alright.

He removed his Jedi robes and got into the shower—he really needed one.

After that, he walked to her bed and saw that she was still sleeping. Her position was, like usual, lying on her side, as if she expected her husband to come and sleep next to her again.

He did it.

He got under the covers and lay there—not in peace, but some similar feeling of comfort and happiness. He breathed in and out… in and out… knowing that the comfort wasn't going to last much longer. Not with such a strong sun that day. He made a hand movement and closed the curtains. Again, the room was all darkness.

Anakin felt Padmé move again and again—maybe she was having some bad dream—she moved until she landed her head on her husband's broad chest.

He kissed the top of her head, lovingly, closing his eyes, really enjoying the moment.

She didn't open her eyes, but Anakin could tell she was on the way of waking up.

"Mmhh… Annie?" she asked, voice low and weak, struggling to open her sleepy eyes.

He swallowed. Then ran his human hand, softly through her cheeks.

She realized what was happening. That wasn't a dream—he really was there.

She tried to sit down, and not look into his face directly.

"You've come back…" she muttered, passing her hands through her face, and pinching herself to wake up.

"Yeah… I—I had to."

"Oh yeah? Why did it take you so long? Weren't you at the temple?"

He struggled. "Well, yes… I just—I couldn't come before."

She didn't bother asking why—she didn't want to know.

She got out of bed and without glancing back at her husband, went into the bathroom to get ready to start the day.

She then sat in front of her mirror, putting on make-up as Anakin watched her. Minutes went like hours in silence between the spouses.

"Do you want breakfast?" she asked dryly, when she was ready, standing by the door.

"Ah… yeah, sure."

"Come on, then. Are you very hungry?"

"No, not really."

"Me neither."

He followed her out of the room.

They sat on the table as awkwardly as two strangers would.

"Good morning," the silence was broken by the protocol droid that entered the breakfast room. "My lady, will we be going to the senate building soon?"

"Yes, Threepio. Any minute now."

"What, you're leaving already?" Anakin snapped. "But I just got here."

She finally looked into his eyes. Sadness and fear was plain in both glances.

"Are we ready to talk about what happened?" she asked, voice unsure and shaking.

He knew they weren't. "I think we should, my love."

She almost melted at how tenderly he pronounced the word _love_.

"I'm sorry, Anakin. I have no excuse, I shouldn't have done—what I did. I can hardly say why I kissed her. And there's no point in looking for excuses. It happened because _I_ let it happen! You have every right to be angry at me—"

 _Do I?_ He thought, hating himself.

 _And why isn't he angry? She_ thought, afraid beyond reason. She would've preferred for him to be all yelling and threatening… that would've been the more logical reaction at finding your wife making out with someone else. _It's because it was with her…_ Padmé's thought almost made her cry. _He is mad at me… but not at her! Does he—oh, does he care so much about Ahsoka?_ She fears to ask.

Again a long silence.

"Why did you return?" she suddenly cried, incensed.

She wanted to make him angry. She needed a reaction from him.

And she succeeded.

"Excuse me?" his voice went low and upset. "You aren't in a place to be so mad, Padmé—you were the one that cheated!"

She was smiling behind the angry grin on her face.

"And that's reason enough to abandon me? What the hell took you so long to come and see me? Did you care so little about me? About our relationship? Was this conversation so low on your list of important things to do? Anakin, did you want to hurt me? To… punish me?"

He was possessed by anger still. "You deserve being hurt… you deserve to be punished!" a voice that was not his own said.

She shuddered. She had seen such a grim look on his lovely face only a few times before… and each time, she felt as if there was someone else, some evil stranger taking over her husband's body and mind.

She had wanted to upset him, but not to such degree…

"Is this why you've come? You can go the same way you came in, Anakin!" she meant none of those words, but she was just speaking venom to hurt him, the same way he had hurt her.

"I actually came to say goodbye…" he lowered his voice again, though this time, it didn't make him more menacing, it only showed his sadness.

"Why?" tears were falling down her cheeks.

"We—we're going to Ringo Vinda. I don't know how long it's gonna be before we return this time."

She gasped. "Oh."

C-3PO came again to interrupt them.

"Senator Amidala, master Anakin, I don't mean to be a pain, but it's getting quite late."

"Yes, Threepio," she said, mechanically. "Just a moment."

Husband and wife looked at each other for a really long time.

They would be separated again… and they were wasting their moments together fighting? Both felt stupid and angry.

Since she was going to be left alone, she was the first to make a move. She just crumbled like soft sand on his arms. He put his arms around her, and for the first time in a week, kissed the love of his life.

"Oh, Annie!" she cried. "Forgive me, darling! Please don't go!"

"I'm afraid that's not my choice!" his voice was trembling with passion, and he was almost out of breath. "I swear, my love, I don't want to leave you! But remember, I'm fighting this war for you! All I do is for you," well, almost everything… "I want the Galaxy to be at peace just for you! I will always return to you, my love. Always!"

"Do you have to go immediately?"

"I guess, yes…but—but," But he didn't care. He carried her in his arms, took her back into their bedroom, and made love to her.

This time, at least at the beginning, Anakin couldn't help but compare Padmé to Ahsoka… and it was just so different.

The night before, he had been an animal having rough, almost meaningless sex. Now, he was as complete as a human man could, in the arms of the person he loved the most in the Galaxy. His eyes had to see her at all times, he cared mostly about whether it was good for her, and he enjoyed the closeness and intimacy as much as he enjoyed her young graceful body…

* * *

 **Okay, I really need to calm down with all these author notes lol.**

 **I've already written a few more chapters for the story and they should be up by next week-or soon-probably-**

 **What do you think about Anakin's actions and attitude? Are you hating him yet? You ain't seen nothing, man!**


	7. Chapter 7

**This one's short. Next one will be good, I promise (wink)**

* * *

7:

"Where is Anakin?" Ahsoka asked Obi-Wan after looking for the young Jedi for almost an hour now.

"I haven't seen him, today, Ahsoka," Obi-Wan said. "Maybe he's still sleeping. He has been training a lot this week, he's probably very tired."

"Yep, he must be tired," _I know I am…_

"So are you better now?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. "You seemed very upset yesterday. I hope you understand that we only seek what's best for you. Anakin and I really believe you could use a break—"

"Listen, master Kenobi, if you say it's best for me to stay in the temple, then I will. But, if Anakin changes his mind and actually wants me on the mission, you will take me, right?"

"Why, of course. Though I doubt he will… he's really worried about you, you know."

"Let's wait and see what he'll do…"

* * *

The goodbye appeared to be impossible between Anakin and Padmé after a wonderful day together, Anakin had to go back to the temple to report to the Council and discuss his next mission.

Usually, when he was assigned a mission, no matter how exciting, he couldn't help the pain that accumulated within him, thinking about how he'd have to spend time apart from his wife.

As he listened to the Jedi masters, the pain was there, but a small bit of hope lived there too, as he thought of the time he will have to heal the recent emotional wounds; time enough to forget about all his mistakes. Time to give Ahsoka the space to distance herself from her infatuation to her master…

Anakin and Obi-Wan were chating, walking the hallways of the temple, the conversation was easy, as it usually was with the two best friends, so when all of the sudden, Obi-Wan felt his former padawan grow tense, he was surprised. A little after, Ahsoka approached them.

"Hello Ahsoka," Anakin said, casually, without faltering. Even he was surprised to see how normal he seemed.

"Hey master," she was just as casual. "I haven't seen you all day."

"Obi-Wan and I were discussing our next mission."

"Our mission? Will I be going, too?" she said slyly. "Of course, I respect your decision, but if I may say, I think you're really gonna need me on this one, master."

Obi-Wan was about to intervene, saying something to let her down easy, but Anakin was quicker—

"Yes, Ahsoka. I think you're right. You will come."

She couldn't hold back her wicked and playful smile.

"Really?" Ahsoka and Obi-Wan said.

"Yeah…" he was as surprised as they were.

"Very well," Obi-Wan accepted. He left and now alone, Anakin motioned Ahsoka to follow him into his private quarters. Again.

* * *

"Really, Anakin," Ahsoka said, lying herself on Anakin's small bed. "Don't you think we've tempted our luck enough?"

"Shut up. We're not gonna do anything right now… I just—I just want to make sure things are clear between us…"

"Okay. Speak."

He sat next to her; at the proximity, she started trembling. He felt it but tried to ignore it. It was hard, though.

"Ahsoka," he begin. Again it was hard to make a sentence, as she had laid her head on his lap.

"Go on," she said, nonchalantly.

"Ahsoka…" now she was playing with his hands. First the human one, then the metal one, which she found quite fascinating.

"Ah-Ahsoka…"

"Yes, Annie?" she asked, mockingly imitating somebody's soft and sweet voice.

That killed his lust for a moment.

"Do not call me that!" he said, almost as if he were threatening her.

"I forgot—only one person can call you that!" she cried, unafraid.

"Do not go there again, Ahsoka!" he cried with a hoarse and mean voice. Her hands were still holding his metal hand, and immediately, he squeezed her, hurting her bones.

She understood…

"Sorry," she tried to lift herself, reaching his face, teasing a kiss that she didn't give.

Her breath on his made both tremble. There was no touch, only the closeness and awaiting...

His arms went around her, his blue eyes closed; he pulled her close, and she realized what he was feeling within… finally she was understanding how to make him want her more—you don't get a man by begging, at least, not one like Anakin Skywalker—you play with him, just enough to upset him but not too far to make him angry—and Anakin was easy to make angry— tease till he's about to explode less you give him what he's desiring with more and more intensity. People always want what they _can't_ have.

Once you see he's in your hands, you can let him know. You are something he _can_ have.

Finally, she let him touch her, she let him run his moist mouth wherever he wanted to, as she was on his lap, she could really feel, she had succeeded…

But if she wanted to keep at least a little bit of power over him, she couldn't give up so easy.

She stood up and started walking around the room. "Didn't you have something to tell me?" she said, struggling to steady her trembling voice.

He cleared his throat. "Oh yeah… what was it? Right! Ahsoka, we-we need some boundaries."

"What do you mean?" she played dumb.

"I—I… forget it."

"Very well, master. I'll go get ready for our trip. See you, Anakin!"

"Wait!" he detained her. "Come here for a moment."

She sensed what he wanted. She wanted it a million times more.

"What?"

 _Kiss me!_ He wanted to cry out. Couldn't find the strength nor the effrontery.

She would've happily jump on him and attack him with embraces, but she just smirked and left the room.

* * *

For some time, she managed to take Padmé out of his mind.

While in battle, he could forget about all that had happened between them. They could be Jedi and padawan; at some odd times, he slipped and called her "Snips" which still bothered her incredibly. As they traveled from planet to planet, no one could tell how many times they had actually succumbed to basic instincts.

At any chance they got alone… well, she didn't ever play hard to get again. She let herself be used to his whim and pleasure. Poor young girl had no one to tell her that even though love and passion go hand in hand, they're not the same thing.


End file.
